14 October 2008

Men are smarter than women!

Next time when your girlfriend / wife / mistress wants you to spend excessive money on her shopping needs again....

remember this....

TRUE STORY (Not me la):

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion started to heat up, and she eventually said, 'I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'

I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that?!'

So she said the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'

She responded to my puzzled look by saying,

'Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep...

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her.

We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store.

I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all.

She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for each outfit.'

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

Let me tell you... She was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck.

I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.'

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier.'

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't feel like it.'

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, 'WHAT?'

I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.

You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added,

'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy for you?'

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

Guys, learned something new today?

5 Macro Voice(s):

Vin Tsen said...

This is a good one!

Marc, 27 said...

vin, agreed!

Mockingbird said...

i think most guys are not as smart as you to get back at your woman the way you did for refusing to get laid with you :p

Marc, 27 said...

mockingbird, its not me la.

Mockingbird said...

i think any man who dares to give such crap to a woman runs the risk of getting dumped by her :p